Ten of the most iconic quotes in Kansas City sports history

I’d like to start by acknowledging the list is likely incomplete. Any list of the most iconic quotes in Kansas City sports history probably will miss one or two of your favorites. Or more.

And if that’s the case, please do contact me with a quote that you think should be included. If it’s good, I’ll add it to this list.

I talked with a number of current and former colleagues, and here are 10 quotes that people remember most from Kansas City athletes or coaches.

“Chewing on cookies and drinking milk and praying is not going to get it done. It’s going to take a lot of hard work and some mind-set. ... And I’d like to see ’em go out and pound tequila rather than cookies and milk, because nobody’s going to get us out of this but us.”

| Former Royals manager Tony Muser after the team was swept in a three game series by the Indians in 2001

“I gave Dan (Devine, the Mizzou coach) the peace sign and he gave half of it back to me.”

| Former Kansas football coach Pepper Rodgers after the Tigers’ 69-21 blowout win in 1969 (Devine denied making the gesture)

“(Larry Johnson) needs to take the diaper off and go play.”

| Former Chiefs coach Dick Vermeil in 2004

“I ask, ‘Why me? Why not Joe McGuff?’ ”

| Former Royals third baseman George Brett on dealing with hemorrhoids during the 1980 World Series

“We’re shooting 100 percent — 60 percent from the field and 40 percent from the free-throw line.”

| Former Missouri basketball coach Norm Stewart

“Greg Hill is the real deal! In case anyone had any doubts, Greg Hill is the real deal!”

| Former Chiefs coach Marty Schottenheimer on running back Greg Hill after a 1997 loss at Denver

“I understand the realities of the athletics pyramid of popularity. I believe the Kansas basketball coach had the power to hold the athletics director in his hand like a dove. He had the choice to either crush me with the power of his influence or to let me fly with my vision for a better total program. He chose to crush me.”

| Former KU athletic director Al Bohl, who believed Roy Williams had pushed for his dismissal in 2003. Williams left shortly thereafter for North Carolina

“Hey guess what? Cy Young winner, not on our team, beat him. Rookie of the year, not on our team, we beat him. MVP of the whole league, sorry guys not on our team. But we beat that guy too!”

| Former Royal Jonny Gomes during the 2015 World Series celebration

“The place should never be described as a wine-and-cheese crowd, and that’s what is sounded like out there tonight. If you don’t want to cheer for us, keep your big butts at home.”

| Williams on KU fans in 2000

“You know what? Maybe when we get home, I can go to the third-base tree and pick another third baseman. ... Obviously, third basemen who can hit and hit with power, they must grow on trees. They’ve got to. Like relief pitchers. And starting pitchers. Right fielders. Left fielders. First basemen. All of these guys must grow on trees, and you must be able to just go get another good one. A ripe one. Make sure it’s ripe. Those trees are at a hidden location but, obviously, they’re somewhere. Because that’s what everyone wants to do. Let’s just go pluck another one out of the tree. That’s the nonsense that really ticks me off.”

| Royals manager Ned Yost in 2013 when talking about Mike Moustakas’ struggles

OK, what’s missing from this list?

UPDATE: Well, that didn’t take long. Some great submissions from readers, as well as current and former Star employees. The number of quotes is up to 27 (and counting).

“I never say it can’t get worse. This game is too hard to play. There’s always something lurking around the corner.”

| Former Royals manager Buddy Bell after a 4-0 loss to the White Sox in 2006

“What are you asking me to do? Take my belt off and spank them? Yell at them? Scream at them? What do you want?”

| Yost after the Royals lost for the 18th time in 22 games in 2013

“I wanted to address quarterback, and how’d I do? That’s not too bad.”

| Former KU coach Charlie Weis after former Notre Dame quarterback Dayne Crist and former BYU quarterback Jake Heaps announced they would play for the Jayhawks in 2012

“Aaron Crow’s inning is the sixth inning. Kelvin’s is the seventh.”

| Yost in 2014 when asked why he brought in Aaron Crow instead of Kelvin Herrera in an 8-4 loss to the Red Sox

“I’ve been to two hog killings and a county fair, and I haven’t seen anything like what Beltran did tonight.”

| Royals relief pitcher Curtis Leskanic on Carlos Beltran’s home-run robbing catch in 2003

“I can’t throw the ball and catch it, too.”

| Former Chiefs quarterback Elvis Gbrac after a loss in 1998 against Pittsburgh

“Keep matriculating the ball down the field, boys!”

| Former Chiefs coach Hank Stram in Super Bowl IV

“You know what John F. Kennedy said when they asked him to run for vice president because he was young and aristocratic and Catholic? He said, ‘Why settle for second when first is available?’ We’ve never played for second. We’ve always played for first, and as long as I continue to be in this wonderful profession, we’re going to continue to play for first.”

| Former Kansas State basketball coach Bob Huggins at his introductory news conference in 2007

“It’s like taking candy from a baby!”

| Stram as the Chiefs’ offense rolled up yardage against the Vikings in Super Bowl IV

“That’s what speed do.”

| Royals outfielder Jarrod Dyson in 2011

“The worst restaurant in San Francisco is better than the best restaurant in Kansas City.”

| Former Chiefs quarterback Steve Bono in 1995

“In a small way, I feel like we won the World Series.”

| Royals general manager after the Royals finished with a winning record in 2013

“You know what this is all about, don’t you? That’s right: BCS, that’s what made a difference today in the game today. That’s what made the difference on the call in front of their bench: dollar signs.”

| Former Kansas coach Mark Mangino after a loss to Texas in 2004

“What you have in Buddy is a man obsessed with losing.”

| Royals president Dan Glass on the hiring of Buddy Bell as manager. It was a Freudian slip. Glass quickly corrected himself to say obsessed with winning.

“A heckuva lot better than being the shortest player in the minor leagues.”

| Former Royals’ Freddie Patek when asked in 1971 how it felt to be the shortest player in the major leagues

“I’ve seen the future and it’s much like the present, only longer.”

| Former Royals pitcher Dan Quisenberry

“All this for a little bit of weed?”

| Former Chiefs tight end Michael Merritt to police, who arrested him in Florida in 2009

This story was originally published September 15, 2016 at 10:18 AM with the headline "Ten of the most iconic quotes in Kansas City sports history."