‘We don’t have answers’: Friends mourn Buddies owner killed in unexplained explosion
Friends say Melvin “Lee” Mecker was a good soul, a caring man and a giver of gifts whose life was cut short under mysterious circumstances.
They say his body was pulled from the wreckage of his exploded house on April 10.
Those who knew Mecker, who owned Buddies bar at 3715 Main Street in Kansas City, trickled into Side Street Bar & Grill Saturday afternoon for a potluck dinner to celebrate his life.
Dozens of people joined the gathering at the bar just over a month after Mecker’s east Kansas City home exploded, then burned down. A body was found in wreckage, and though Kansas City police haven’t identified the deceased victim, friends say it was Mecker.
“What we’ve been feeling has been so hard. Since we don’t know, we don’t have answers,” said Mel Hudgens, who manages Side Street. “That closure that people need, this is what people need now. This is what we need to go forward.”
Hudgens knew Mecker through the bar business. Mecker, 58, ran Buddies gay bar first as a manager and then an owner for the past two decades.
A slideshow of photos looping on a television screen placed in the back of Side Street Saturday showed a smiling Mecker, who enjoyed dressing up in costumes for St. Patrick’s Day and Halloween at his bar. Buddies has been closed since Mecker’s death.
Mecker showed his kindness, Hudgens said, by giving: loaning money to people, cooking for the homeless, offering rides and clothing.
“A simple hug when they needed it,” Hudgens added. “He really showed love to a lot of people.”
Kevin Thompson, another close friend, said Mecker came into his life about 18 years ago when he was going through marital problems and was on the verge of coming out as a gay man. Thompson said Mecker helped him in hard times, and the two spent time together watching movies, going out to eat, hanging out at Buddies.
Thompson described one time in his life when he was beaten in a past relationship.
Mecker took him to the hospital. “He sat there with me the whole entire time,” Thompson said, holding back tears.
But in recent years, Thompson became worried for Mecker.
Before his death, police records show, Mecker sought help of his own after an ex-boyfriend he was living with allegedly tried to run him over with a vehicle, set fire to his house and beat him.
Thompson and Hudgens are still waiting to find out what happened to the kind-hearted man they knew.
Police have not ruled the death a homicide, and the Jackson County Medical Examiner’s Office has not determined a cause of death for the body removed from the fire, police said earlier this month.
“We just want answers,” Hudgens said. “Just a simple (answer) to what really happened.”
This story was originally published May 11, 2019 at 4:36 PM.
