My refugee family built its American dream in Kansas City. I see our story in Ukraine

To say that my life has changed since 1999, when reporter Eric Adler wrote about my family in The Star, is an understatement. But to say that it’s a vague memory would be unfitting. Twenty-four years ago, my family and I relocated to Kansas City as political refugees from Bosnia and Herzegovina. War had begun in our country in the spring of 1992, leaving us in almost the identical situation that we see Ukrainian families in today.

The war caught my parents Jasmin and Izeta by surprise, just like the people of Ukraine. The home that they had just built for us was erased within a matter of minutes by bombs. The washer that my mother so eagerly awaited had been used only a handful of times. The pages of the schoolbooks that my older sister Belma had received to help her prepare for first grade were never turned.

As we see on the news today from Eastern Europe, my mother, sister and I were given the opportunity to escape Bosnia by relocating to Germany. We constantly moved campsites, sleeping on metal war beds next to hundreds of people. My mother prepared food for us in makeshift kitchens. As a young child, these circumstances did not bother me so much. They felt like an adventure that allowed me to meet people and make new friends.

My father stayed back and fought in the war. Saying goodbye to him — seeing fear in his eyes for the first time — did bother me. This is a memory that has stayed with me my entire life. He fought for four years, then thankfully joined us in Germany in 1995. Being reunited with him was an emotion that I will never forget, either. I had been eagerly awaiting his return to fill him in on all the things that I had become and learned in those years without him.

Right as we were settling in as a complete family again, we were given the option of either returning home or relocating once more — but this time to the other side of the world, in the United States. My parents jumped at the opportunity to move here. They were hopeful that the American dream that they had heard of would allow us to rebuild our life — the life that they had envisioned when they married. And that came to be.

Fast forward to today, March 2022, on the 24th anniversary of us becoming U.S. residents, and now citizens. My sister and I were always reminded by our parents of how fortunate we were to have been given the opportunity to earn an education, and neither of us ever took that for granted. After obtaining my bachelor of business management degree, I was given the chance to work for large organizations in human resources roles within several industries such as financial technology, information technology, retail and entertainment. My sister obtained her degree in health care management and has fulfilled her lifelong dream of helping others through the medical field.

This past July, my father was diagnosed with cancer — up until then something that we were fortunate enough to only have heard about through others, though we always empathized with those affected by it. But this time, we were affected. We were relieved to know that the nation that we call home, America, has some of the world’s best physicians. We immediately sought the best treatment plan at hospitals across the country. But cancer ultimately won the battle. After just six short months, we lost my father on Jan. 17 of this year.

My soul’s desire to catch up on the time that I had missed with my father as a young child was never truly fulfilled. But what gives me ease in moving on with life without him is knowing that his wish for his family has been fulfilled through the American dream.

Today, Ukrainians already in the United States have been granted Temporary Protected Status from the Department of Homeland Security, allowing them to remain here for 18 months. As Russia’s illegal war on their homeland continues, who knows how many more will be displaced? If Ukrainian refugees need shelter on our shores, I hope we will show them the open arms that let my family prosper.

This story was originally published March 13, 2022 at 5:00 AM with the headline "My refugee family built its American dream in Kansas City. I see our story in Ukraine."