Elijah Ming’s KCK murder isn’t about hate for police. It’s worse than that | Opinion

The KCKPD had never before been called to the house where Wyandotte County Sheriff’s Deputy Elijah Ming was fatally shot trying to provide some cover and security to a woman who had called in saying she was moving out and afraid for her safety.

So it’s not like the police had ignored a bunch of calls for help as the situation escalated.

A neighbor said the suspect was considered someone to avoid, but you can’t dial 911 and say, “Hey, there’s this dude down the way who looks like trouble to me.”

And let’s not even think about laying this on the woman who was trying to get away from him.

“Domestic violence is a real issue,” District Attorney Mark Dupree said at a Monday news conference. “And I want to say to every family, every father, every mother, every auntie, every uncle, that the early signs of domestic violence should be taken serious. If he or she, but the majority of the time it is he, is controlling, is combative, doesn’t allow you to go places, moves you from the ones that love you, take the signs serious and get out. Before it’s too late. But to you young people, to you older people who are in these situations, the end of it is death,” Dupree said. “Don’t take it lightly. Do something about it now.”

All true, every word, which is why I repeated all of them. And yes, do something. I don’t think Dupree was blaming the woman who called for help. But she was leaving, which is the most dangerous time of all for those trying to escape a violent relationship.

This suspect, who had done a long stint in prison, and has now been charged with capital murder and criminal possession of a firearm by a convicted felon, had only been out from under court supervision since December, so maybe she was getting out early.

And there is no guarantee that if she had left a week or a month before, the result would have been any different. Which is not to say anyone should stay in an abusive situation, but is to say that those who think it’s easy to walk away are mistaken.

Mayor Tyrone Garner, himself a former KCKPD officer, spoke angrily about the shooting as a symptom of the general disregard of law enforcement.

“For those of you that may have misconceptions, and we know they’re out there, and say, ‘but that’s what we pay law enforcement officers to do,’ I reject that. We don’t pay good police officers and good sheriff’s deputies and good law enforcement professionals to be mistreated, to be cussed out, to be battered, to be beaten, to be shot, to be killed.”

I can understand why he’s venting; rampaging domestic violence and typically brainless gun violence have stolen another good man from his family and community. Our gun-worship and callousness towards one another are both out of control, and no, I’m not saying any gun law would have saved Ming’s life, because, see above, the suspect was not even supposed to have a firearm.

But more guns than people who seem to have less empathy all the time is not moving us in the right direction, either.

I want to be able to say that surely no one thinks we pay police to get beaten and shot. I want to be able to say that even all of us who are critical of bad police are grateful to the good ones.

But can I? More and more, I’m horrified by the reasons non-criminals come up with to justify the murder of all kinds of people, and say that our fellow human beings who should still be hugging their kids had it coming.

I’m no fan of the health insurance industry, but although there was nothing cute or defensible about the man who shot and killed the UnitedHeatlhcare CEO last December, people I’ve known for years defended and fawned over him.

A now former friend seemed to me to be unbothered by the murders of Sarah Milgrim and Yaron Lischinsky as they were coming out of a Washington, D.C. event about getting more aid into Gaza, because they worked for the Israeli embassy.

On social media on Wednesday, a Facebook post slamming one of the victims of the shooting in the New York NFL building because she worked as a senior executive at Blackstone and thus had contributed to making housing in the city less affordable got some likes and agreement before it was taken down. Where does this ghoulish blameathon end?

So when Garner says we need a reset, I could not agree more. Of not just respect for law enforcement, but for every person with a pulse. Even if we find some fault with them, because who doesn’t have some? It was not always like this, and doesn’t have to be.

This story was originally published July 31, 2025 at 11:37 AM.