‘I still said no’: Man admits to sex with ‘incredibly drunk’ KC woman. Was it rape?

Taylor Brown says she was sexually assaulted by a close friend in her childhood bedroom after a night of drinking.

Brown had never had sex before the alleged assault, and she had never consumed alcohol in large quantities. But during a gathering at her mother’s Kansas City home months after her 21st birthday, Brown and others took several shots of hard liquor, she said.

The next day, Brown confronted the alleged perpetrator and others she believed witnessed the assault. She also told a close friend. Brown was left confused and angry, with no desire to be alive. She still suffers from post-traumatic stress.

In 2018, and again earlier this year, Brown spoke with the Kansas City Police Department about the 2015 alleged assault. Attorneys for the alleged assailant and witnesses were questioned by detectives, but no charges were filed by the Jackson County prosecutor’s office.

Investigators received copies of letters and other messages exchanged by Brown and the alleged assailant. The man repeatedly apologized for having sex with Brown while they were intoxicated.

“Both Taylor and I got incredibly drunk, and neither of us had any idea what we were doing,” he wrote. “We ended up in a bedroom and having sex.”

The correspondence was one of three two-page letters the man penned to Brown, her future husband and her future children.

The act was not consensual, Brown told police detectives. Multiple times, she told associates that she did not want to have sex. Brown was incapacitated and incapable of giving consent, she said.

“I was drunk and inebriated, but I still said no,” Brown said. “I was stuck in my body and couldn’t move.”

So, why didn’t Assistant Prosecuting Attorney Lauren Barrett bring charges in the case? The man admitted to having sex with a woman who couldn’t consent.

Missouri law is clear about consent

A person who has sexual intercourse with another person who is incapable of consent, or by the use of forcible compulsion, commits the crime of first-degree rape, according to Missouri statutes. This includes the use of a substance such as alcohol that renders the victim physically or mentally impaired and incapable of consenting to sex.

“We reviewed the case twice and declined to pursue charges both times,” a spokesman for the Jackson County prosecutor’s office said. “Two different detectives investigated the case. There was insufficient evidence to file charges.”

The alleged assailant’s friend talked Brown out of getting a forensic exam the morning after the assault. The Star is not identifying the alleged perpetrator because the man has not been charged with a crime. He did not return messages seeking comment.

Alcohol affects decision-making, experts say. A person must be able to communicate their wants and needs after drinking, something Brown clearly couldn’t do.

Allegations of sexual assault are less likely to be taken seriously when drugs, including alcohol, are involved, said Jennifer Gentile Long, chief executive officer of AEquitas: The Prosecutors’ Resource on Violence Against Women in Washington, D.C. People who have been sexually assaulted after voluntarily consuming intoxicants frequently have their behaviors scrutinized, Long said.

“The focus should be on the behavior of the person who caused them harm,” she wrote in a statement.

Sadly, Brown’s story is a familiar one, advocates say. Alcohol is the most common drug used to facilitate sexual assault, said Victoria Pickering, director of advocacy for Metropolitan Organization to Counter Sexual Assault.

“Alcohol has the characteristics that make reporting sexual assault difficult,” Pickering said. “Survivors are often shamed, but we must believe survivors and provide them with support.”

Advocates say that many victims of sexual assault delay going to police because they are overwrought with guilt. Brown took years to work up enough courage and strength to report the crime.

Now, she wants to share her story.

“My voice doesn’t matter to my rapist or the (authorities),” she said. “But I am tired of being quiet.”

Alleged attacker worked for World Revival Church

Brown, who is now 27, graduated from Libby Lane Academy in Lee’s Summit, a school operated by World Revival Church, a mega-church with a worldwide following. It was there that Brown met and became friends with her alleged attacker, who is a former employee of the church. Brown left the church shortly after graduating.

Two other members of the church were present the night of the incident but did not witness an assault, their attorneys told police.

A young woman with close ties to church leaders tried to dissuade Brown from reporting the sexual assault to authorities, Brown said. Messages exchanged between Brown and the woman provided to The Star Editorial Board back those claims.

“May I ask why you are trying to protect him?” Brown wrote to the woman in May 2017.

“Because I see his heart and hard work,” the woman replied. “I know he didn’t make the best of choices and decisions 2 years ago. But I see how hard he has worked to get his life back and make good decisions.”

Of course, the man’s “good decisions” more recently have nothing to do with his culpability for the 2015 incident.

The woman is not being named because she is a witness to a potential crime.

Officials at World Revival distanced themselves from the alleged assault, saying that the incident was never formally reported to church leadership and did not take place on church grounds.

Brown wants to share her story in hopes of bringing attention to drug- and alcohol-facilitated sexual assault.

But will anybody listen? Coming forward required tremendous courage, but the obstacles Brown has encountered underscore why so many women are reluctant to go to the police. Too often, the default position in sexual assault cases is to disbelieve the woman.

Some other members of World Revival have closed ranks around the alleged assailant. And even a written admission from the man that he had sexual intercourse with Brown when she was “incredibly drunk” was not sufficient to spur charges.

Brown deserves more than just the chance to share her story. Like all victims of sexual assault, she deserves to be believed, and she deserves justice.