Candy wars: Enough with the ‘candy corn shaming’
How did we get to this sad, dark place, where a lowly, tri-colored sliver of corn syrup and sugar is thus reviled?
“Many people like candy corn, such as hobos, serial murderers, and Satan. But actually, candy corn is terrible,” a Smartie at Deadspin wrote last Halloween.
“If you give it out to trick-or-treating children this evening, you belong in f***ing prison.”
Pop star Ariana Grande and others have made their candy corn scorn public in that most modern of ways — hate tweets.
Does anyone actually like candy corn? Personally, I'd rather slice open my stomach and jump rope with my own intestines than eat candy corn.
— Ariana Grande (@ArianaGrande) October 31, 2013
Candy corn is Satan's hardened ear wax
— Allie Baldwin (@baldwin_allie) October 28, 2015
But stand down, Grande, with your Venti-sized hate. Candy corn fans are coming (slowly) out into the open.
i like candy corn and i am proud!!
— Jimmy Bailey (@_JimmyBailey) October 19, 2016
I realize I may lose a lot of followers but I feel someone must step forward on this issue. I like candy corn. There. I said it.
— Janet Lee Nye (@JanLNye) October 15, 2016
It's time to admit this, I'm not afraid anymore... I like candy corn and I'm not ashamed of it
— Jared Howard (@JaredHoward18) October 14, 2016
YouTuber Rinny Riot made a video Valentine to show her love for Brach’s candy corn.
“To the haters of candy corn. Honestly, like how could you be a hater?” she says.
“How could you be a hater of something that’s brought the world nothing but joy. It’s a honey kiss. It’s a buttery hug, you know. How can you hate that? I mean, if you hate that, and there’s nothing but hate inside your heart, I mean, are you really living?”
Lifestyle expert Brooke Sassman wrote an equally impassioned essay about her love for candy corn for the “Today” show earlier this month.
“I wish I could tell you how many times my love of candy corn has been met by a face of pure disgust. But I can and will tell you: It's undoubtedly one of the best candies on the market,” Sassman wrote.
“‘Candy corn shaming’ is a real thing. A REAL THING. Yes, it is my favorite Halloween candy. And YES, I stock up during Halloween just so I'll have enough to last through the year.”
Candy corn, Sassman gushed, is “a bite-size bit of pure deliciousness.”
That amplifies the declaration of the BuzzFeed staff two years ago that declared: “If you don’t like candy corn you’re a dumb idiot.”
Either that, or you haven’t checked out the nearly 250,000 #candycorn posts on Instagram, where clearly people love candy corn for reasons other than its waxy taste.
Candy corn-inspired hairstyles!
Candy corn bagels!
Candy corn-colored bullets!
Wait, what?
Bartenders are lending cool to the corn by including the despised treat in recipes for cocktails and even Jell-O shots.
The Vivino wine app included it on a list of Halloween candy-wine pairings. Apparently candy corn goes best with a sweet Moscato.
Oddly, despite all the nastiness spewed on social media, people actually like candy corn.
CandyStore.com’s new infographic showing each state’s favorite Halloween candy reveals that candy corn is No. 1 in Idaho, Michigan, New Mexico, Rhode Island and South Carolina.
“These are the states that love candy corn — and therefore must be shamed,” snarked The Daily Dot.
Another national candy map making the rounds from the Influenster shopping review site shows that “the polarizing Halloween treat” is the candy of choice in the most number of states in its survey.
Oregon, Wyoming, Tennessee, Texas, and South Carolina all loved candy corn more than Twizzlers, Skittles, Kit Kats and Snickers.
That news didn’t sit well in the Lone Star state, where candy snobs quickly pounced on their peers for their “bad taste.”
Who in Texas voted for candy corn? Now our state look cheap asf and dingy. Square up. https://t.co/5UWjgwYXnT
— jona' marie✨ (@_jayystarbby_) October 19, 2016
But if candy corn is so evil, why does it have its own day?
The day before Halloween, Oct. 30, is National Candy Corn Day.
Take that, haters.
I LIKE CANDY CORN. FIGHT ME COWARDS
— Tatiana Madrigal (@NWMentality) October 19, 2016
This story was originally published October 19, 2016 at 1:48 PM with the headline "Candy wars: Enough with the ‘candy corn shaming’."