You probably know Mary Jane.
You might even know Alice B Toklas, Little Green Friends and Juan Valdez.
But My Brother is a new acquaintance.
A newly unclassified intelligence report from the Drug Enforcement Administration lists new slang terms and code words for cocaine, LSD, heroin and other drugs - including more than 250 alone for marijuana.
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Weed? Pot? You’re so 1986.
Marijuana’s many aliases today include Smoochy Woochy Poochy, Mowing the Lawn, Giggle Weed, Big Pillows, Churro, Skywalker, Sweet Lucy and Rghteous Bush, according to the DEA’s list.
And those are last year’s names.
New names on the DEA’s list include Alfalfa, Bazooka, Blue Dream, Fattie, Lucas, Mexicali Haze, Green Crack, Red Hair, Train Wreck - and Shoes.
The agency describes the list, first published in May 2017, as a “ready reference” for law enforcement to use in, well, recognizing when the bad guys are talking about drugs.
“Although every effort was made to ensure the accuracy and completeness of the information presented, due to the dynamics of the ever-changing drug scene, subsequent additions, deletions, and corrections are inevitable,” the report notes.
According to the Asbury Park Press, some of the slang names are derived from scientific monikers for the plant, while others are popular strain names - Girl Scout Cookies, really? - or ways to consume marijuana, such as Puff.
“And then there are the completely ridiculous monikers: Have you ever heard someone refer to marijuana as ‘smoochy woochy poochy’?” the Press writes.
The medical marijuana website Leafly apparently had not.
“Smoochy Woochy Poochy? Really?” it writes.
According to Marijuana Moment, a cannabis news site, more than 50 of the names on the DEA’s list are new from last year, “and some of them are just plain weird.”
“My Brother, Pink Panther and Plant made the list for the first time this year. (Have you heard of those?)“ writes Marijuana Moment.
“That said, it seems that the federal agency is beginning to understand the concept of strains, as several common strain names are included in the updated list, released this month: blue dream, green crack and train wreck, for example.”
Marijuana Moment noticed that old-school favorite, Devil’s Lettuce, is still on the A-list.
The website also notes that this year’s report has grown from last year’s seven pages to 125, thanks to a “robust new ‘slang-to-drug’ look-up feature in addition to the old list of alphabetized drugs followed by paragraphs worth of slang terms.”
Does that come in wallet size? Just wondering for a friend.