A room of their own: The idea of a doggie playroom appeals to this empty nester

I’m an empty-nester trope. I recently had to admit to myself that I now embody every single empty-nester characteristic. The most profound one is that I have taken my pets and turned them into my children.

I’m not saying my pets weren’t beloved family members before my kids ran away from home. (OK, they didn’t run away. They just grew up, and really, how dare they?) But now my animals have achieved favorite child status.

I knew I had made the leap from pet besotted to obsessed when I was at the vet and a woman, who seemed to be about my age, walked in with her dog in a car seat/baby carrier. This dog was also swaddled in a monogrammed blanket and quite frankly I wouldn’t have been surprised if there was also a pacifier in there. Of course, I immediately engaged her in conversation, because how could I not?

It was a fascinating chit-chat that started with the ease of transporting your small breed dog in a baby carrier to turning one of the now-empty bedrooms in your home into a playroom for your dogs. Lucky for me there were a plethora of photos on this woman’s phone.

For those of you curious about just what’s in a dog’s playroom — and I’m going to say with confidence that it’s everyone — imagine a day bed placed by the window with “velvet flannel” sheets in a dog print motif. On the floor was a furry orthopedic memory foam rug. The art on the walls was hand-illustrated portraits of the owner’s dogs. There were several wicker baskets filled with “smart” toys and a knotted rope attached to the wall so the dogs could play tug-of-war when their owner wasn’t present.

The final bit of delicious dog decor overshare was that there are now interior designers who work with canine behavior therapists to create a playroom “that provides stimulation for your dog and also creates a restful environment.”

When I walked out of the vet I wanted to laugh at this over-the-top pet owner, but somehow I couldn’t. That night at dinner when I told my husband and son about my experience, I joked that this was going to me in five years. My son said with a laugh, “Five years? Try five months.”

I protested but now every time I pass my kids’ former bedrooms all I can think about is how perfect it would be to make one of them a dog playroom. Especially the one with two large floor-to-ceiling windows that provide prime views for neighborhood surveillance and barking. I could easily add a day bed that’s lower to the floor and frame some of the hundreds of pictures I’ve taken of my pets.

Quite frankly, the only thing stopping me is my family thinking I’m insane. But it could already be too late for that. Last week I told my husband that our beagle was more beautiful than our human kids.

Don’t judge me too harshly because this dog has the most gorgeous eyes in the animal kingdom. And don’t worry, my kids never read anything I write, so this confession is just between us.

And if my children didn’t want me to go full-crazy pet mom then they shouldn’t have left me. There I said it.

Now, excuse me while I measure for curtains in what could be my dogs’ new playroom. I say “could be” because there’s a strong chance my husband might make me seek therapy if I go through with this.

I’m thinking a paw print pattern would be lovely, don’t you?

Reach Sherry Kuehl at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com, on Facebook at Snarky in the Suburbs, on Twitter at @snarkynsuburbs on Instagram @snarky.in.the.suburbs, and snarkyinthesuburbs.com.

This story was originally published November 30, 2022 at 6:30 AM with the headline "A room of their own: The idea of a doggie playroom appeals to this empty nester."