No ordinary chili: In college football season, a bowl of leftovers holds magic beans

I guess dreams do come true and miracles can actually happen because the Texas Longhorns are in the College Football Playoff semifinals. This means that my husband’s joy was boundless for about 60 seconds.

When the announcement was made about what teams would be in the semifinals he was thrilled when UT got in. Then he went into his dark place, and by that I mean he started talking about all the ways they could lose.

For me, the wife of a die-hard Longhorn football fan, this is nothing new. I’ve been an eyewitness to this level of football angst for years. In fact, this season the team went 12-1, but if you had been with my husband during the games you would have thought they were horrible.

This is because he feels deeply. (Please note I’m using “feels deeply” as code for “crazy.”) Every freaking play is life or death and worthy of a “comment.” (Comment is my code for “swearing.”)

We even had tickets to the Texas at Iowa State game in November and didn’t go. The reasons were varied and lengthy.

The top three were our attendance might be a jinx and Texas would lose. Number two was I told my husband I would only go to the game with him if he promised I wouldn’t have to listen to him rant non-stop for the three-plus hour car ride home if Texas lost. He informed me that was a promise he wouldn’t make. And the number one reason we didn’t go to the game is because I convinced him that he was too emotionally fragile to watch a UT game outside of his basement safe space. You know because he “feels” so deeply.

Now, those feelings have entered the turbulent phrase. I, for one, blame that freaking portal. I now know more than I ever wanted to about the college football transfer portal. For those of you lucky enough to not know what this is, briefly, the portal allows student athletes to let all the other colleges know, “Hey, I’m open to coming to play for you. So, make me an offer.”

When UT‘s second string quarterback announced he was entering the portal a mere 20 days before the College Football Playoff semifinal game, it wasn’t a great day for Longhorn fans — or anyone who loves a Longhorn fan. This is because the quarterback also declared that because of this he has chosen not to play in the bowl game.

This threw my husband into such a tizzy that he’s now made a bowl of chili into a shrine. Confused? Of course, you are.

Here’s the backstory. When Texas beat Oklahoma State, thus clinching the Big 12 Championship that propelled the team into the college football playoffs, my husband was eating chili. He then saved the leftover chili and put it in the freezer. Now, he’s taken that “good luck” chili out of the freezer and, well, I’ve seen him talking to it. It’s like he’s imploring the chili to use its “power” for another victory.

This is what happens I guess when you “feel deeply” about your alma mater and its football team. All I really know is that when Texas plays in the Sugar Bowl on New Year’s Day, I’m absolutely certain my husband will be watching that game while hugging that bowl of chili. Fingers crossed the chili delivers a win.

Reach Sherry Kuehl at snarkyinthesuburbs@gmail.com, on Facebook at Snarky in the Suburbs, on Twitter at @snarkynsuburbs on Instagram @snarky.in.the.suburbs, and snarkyinthesuburbs.com.