‘He’s a part of the family’: Olathe parents struggle to get adopted son out of Ukraine
When Jessica and Matt Pflumm welcomed a teenage boy from southern Ukraine into their Olathe home in December, it felt as if their world had been made whole.
By the time his stay with the family had ended in January, they had filed adoption papers to make the teenager, Max, a permanent member of their home. But last Thursday, when Russia invaded Ukraine, sending thousands fleeing in the face of missile strikes and gunfire, Max’s adoption was put on hold.
Now, they are doing everything within their power to make his once temporary Kansas home permanent — and fast.
Max spent nine years living in a Ukrainian orphanage before the Pflumm’s hosted him over the holidays.
They bought him a cellphone. And though they speak almost every day, Jessica and Matt Pflumm are in a constant state of worry.
“We’re trying to bring him home. He’s a part of our family,” Jessica Pflumm said.
Because of an 8-hour time difference between Kansas and Ukraine, the couple stay up all night just to hear from him. Matt Pflumm takes the first shift, waiting from 10 p.m. until 2 a.m. to receive a text back from the Max. Jessica Pflumm waits by the phone from 2 a.m. to 6 a.m.
On Tuesday morning, Jessica Pflumm received a text from Max:
“I’m not afraid. We are not afraid. It’s hard to scare us.”
He told her that despite being far from the bigger cities embroiled in battle with Russian troops, tanks were driving through the area and sirens were going off throughout the village.
Max said in a message that he is living in a bunker underneath the orphanage with other children. He is only allowed to go outside a few times a day because of the danger of gunshots. At night, the tanks patrolling the area barrel into action. That’s when the fear starts to creep in. The children are forced to spend sleepless nights waiting for warfare.
Jessica Pflumm said one of her biggest fears is that he takes up arms and begins fighting alongside other young Ukrainian men. On Feb. 23, Ukraine’s president Volodymyr Zelensky put a draft in place for men aged 18 through 60.
“I could cry right now,” she said. “There’s a lot of tears because it’s hard to have kids going through something that they don’t deserve to go through. Especially when they’re already coming from trauma, it’s hard.”
A new home
While living in Olathe, Max felt like one of the family, according to the Pflumms. He spent hours playing UNO card games with the family’s 7-year-old and loved to shoot basketballs into the hoop set up outside alongside the 11-year-old.
He went to church with them on Christmas Eve and even got emotional when he saw how much the celebration meant to the family.
“Max just fit into our family so perfectly, like he just rolled with the punches,” Jessica Pflumm said.
He told her that what he is looking forward to most upon returning to Olathe is spending time with the family, especially over dinner.
Jessica Pflumm said she is ready for him, listing off his favorite foods, from burgers to pizza and promising to leave out some of his least favorite, like lettuce and onions.
But until then, she and the family are raising money for foundations working to get orphans like Max out of Ukraine through a fundraiser.
She hopes to convince federal officials to pressure Ukraine’s government into evacuating the up to 110,000 orphans in 650 institutions across the country and has been meeting with Kansas Secretary of State Scott Schwab.
His office did not immediately respond for comment.
Jessica Pflumm said that teenagers in orphanages are often the last ones to get chosen for adoption. Max was one of the last within his group at the agency to be adopted.
“We just knew that he deserved a chance just like the younger kids,” she said.
This story was originally published March 2, 2022 at 5:00 AM.
