Kansas City prohibited funerals because of COVID-19. Few knew the ban was soon lifted
The rule on weddings and funerals sounded absolute when Kansas City Mayor Quinton Lucas signed his sweeping stay at home order on March 21 in the face of the advancing coronavirus.
“Individuals may leave their residences or places of rest only to perform ‘Essential Activities,’” his order read, adding definitions. “’Essential Activities’ do not include weddings, funerals, wakes, memorial services or similar gatherings.”
The order was the strictest of any city or county in Missouri or Kansas, where funerals were still allowed as long as they were attended by 10 people or fewer.
But on March 31, one week after the order took effect, Kansas City relaxed and clarified its order, allowing graveside services in keeping with other cities and counties.
It’s a rule change that many in the funeral industry were not aware of. Earlier this week, the Missouri Funeral Directors and Embalmers Association was still advising its 300 members not to hold funerals in Kansas City.
“Funeral homes may still remain open, the funeral home is still an essential business,” said Don Otto, the executive director. “But within the Kansas City city limits, our interpretation of the city rules is that no funerals, no visitations, period.”
DiMond Piggie, owner of Golden Funeral and Cremation Service, was also still under the impression this week that graveside services of any size had been banned.
“When you think of Kansas City, itself, we’re not supposed to have any kind of gatherings of any kind,” he said. Piggie said that since the order went into effect March 24, he has only been performing burials and cremations with no services.
Others got the message right away. Nearly every day, hearses carrying the remains of loved ones, accompanied by small gatherings of mourners, make their way to grave sites at Kansas City’s cemeteries like Forest Hill & Calvary, Newcomer’s Floral Hills and Mt. Saint Mary’s.
The day before the original city order took effect, David Tinoco and his family rushed to bury his father, Albert “Tic Toc” Tinoco, who died on March 19 at age 86. Albert Tinoco was beloved by many in Kansas City’s Hispanic community, and when he died, his family anticipated that his funeral would likely have drawn 1,500 people or more to Sacred Heart-Guadalupe Parish.
When Albert Tinoco’s wife, Angelina, died in 1999, her funeral at the West Side church was attended by more than 1,000 people. A traffic helicopter tracked the funeral cortege.
On March 23, the Tinocos believed that his might be one of the last funerals in Kansas City until the ban was lifted. Only 10 family members were allowed to attended his service inside the Catholic church.
A March 31 update, now posted on the city’s website, states: “Funeral gatherings with over 10 persons are prohibited under the Mayor’s Emergency Proclamation.”
Piggie said he understands why graveside services, despite being small, would still be held. Because of fear of spreading the coronavirus, visitors are prevented from visiting loved ones in area hospitals. Those who are dying in hospitals are often doing so without their loved ones at their sides.
“It’s kind of hard to say, ‘No, you can’t see your mom. We know she passed in the hospital and they didn’t let you come see her there because of safety reasons. We’re not going to let you see her (at burial), either,’” he said. “It’s kind of insensitive to handle it that way.”
To some, the original policy also seemed incongruous with other city orders that, for example, continued to allow hundreds of people to gather in parks as long as they maintained social distancing, but would not allow 10 people to gather but keep their distance at a cemetery.
“The problem’s been it’s changed. The first part was so confusing,” Charlie Passantino, owner of Passantino Bros. Funeral Home in Kansas City, said of the rule. “And the other problem is that, at one point, Kansas City basically had the strictest policy of the whole state. So now, it’s kind of getting a bit more uniform with the 10 people rule.”
Passantino said that the city relaxed its rule to be more in line with state and other county regulations after funeral directors, and the local Roman Catholic diocese looked to clarify the rule with the mayor’s office and Kansas City Health Department.
Health department spokeswoman Michelle Pekarsky said the alteration is not so much a blanket change as it is a clarification of the existing order.
Funeral homes still are not holding inside services, visitations or wakes. Many families are opting to wait until the pandemic restrictions have been fully relaxed to hold memorial services at later dates.
At Forest Hill & Calvary Cemetery, funerals still occur daily, attended by fewer than 10 people who maintain social distance at the graveside. Others who attend either drive by or watch from their cars at a distance.
“People don’t like it,” Steve Pierce, the owner of Muehlebach Funeral Care in Kansas City, said of the 10-person limit. “But they understand.”
This story was originally published April 8, 2020 at 5:00 AM.
