Tips for a successful holiday cocktail party

The event at Hall’s On Grand was called “Drink, Decorate, Be Merry.” But it could have been called “Drink, Decorate, Be Merrily,” since everyone wants to be like Merrily Jackson when it comes to hosting a party.

Jackson, author of the monthly Essential Entertaining, in Kansas City Spaces magazine, and a frequent guest on KSHB-TV’s “Kansas City Live,” was on hand at the event to impart tips on no-fuss holiday entertaining. Anyone and everyone on the local society circuit knows Jackson. She’s nearly iconic with her tiny round tortoiseshell eyeglasses, big chunky pearls and know-how for hosting memorable soirees.

She’s also very funny, warm and personable — traits that make for the quintessential hostess. I met Merrily a couple of years ago after I sent her an email about how much I enjoyed seeing her speak at a local event. She immediately responded with an invitation to have drinks with her and Zim Loy, editor of Spaces.

Jackson admitted to the guests at Hall’s that she sometimes wakes the morning of a party in a state of defcon 4. So she often enlists a close friend to come 30 minutes early to have a drink and assist with last-minute preparations. That way, she’s able to execute the ABC’s of hosting: A for ambiance with music and lighting (“Low lighting hides a multitude of sins on people and your home”), B for be present (station yourself by the front door to greet guests), C consider your company (it’s not about you) and D, don’t confuse effort with results (for a stellar dinner party, make a big pot of something ahead of time, she says. “Nobody wants to see you huffing and puffing.”)

For a two-hour cocktail party, she suggests preparing four to six hors d'oeuvres and three drinks per guest.

Here are her other tips for hosting the perfect holiday party.

▪ Plan it for two hours only: Otherwise you won’t reach the critical mass that makes a cocktail party fun.

▪ Invite people from varied circles: “Everyone should know someone, but no one should know everyone,” she said. And you don’t have to know people well to invite them for cocktails.

▪ Don’t worry about your house being too small: People like to be all packed in together. “You want it to be butt-to-butt so it’s looks oversold,” she said.

▪ Don’t worry about not having enough seating: Nobody sits at a cocktail party.

▪ Serve only finger food: Don’t make your guests juggle plates, forks and drinks.

▪ Place drink stations where you want people to congregate: Put ice in coolers underneath drink tables.

▪ An open bar is nice, but you don’t need one: A signature drink, plus wine and beer, is enough for an enjoyable cocktail party.

▪ Have plenty of nonalcoholic options for nondrinkers and designated drivers. Also download the Uber app, and send over-served guests home in style.

▪ Don’t forget the music: Classic jazz is perfect for a cocktail party. You can’t go wrong with Billie Holiday, Ella Fitzgerald and Cal Tjader. She also loves Pandora’s “Hipster Cocktail Party.”

▪ Arrange things in advance so you, as the host, don’t have to work too hard: If you don’t hire staff, enlist friends to help.

Mix together and pour over ice in a wine glass, hurricane glass, or — most elegant — a tall, thin highball glass. Garnish with a lime wedge and a fresh cranberry. Leave the vodka out and this is a lovely mocktail for nondrinkers.

The perfect party playlist

Want to go all-digital? Merrily Jackson suggests typing “Hipster cocktail party” into Pandora for a fabulous musical backdrop to your party. Or, if you prefer playing CD’s, try these Merrily favorites.

▪ Frank Sinatra: “It Might As Well Be Swing” (arranged by Quincy Jones)

▪ “The Best of Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong”

▪ Diana Krall: “Love Scenes”

▪ Madeleine Peyroux: “Careless Love”

▪ “Ken Burns Jazz: The Story of America’s Music”

This story was originally published November 13, 2015 at 6:00 AM with the headline "Tips for a successful holiday cocktail party."