Red Zone

Donkey droppings alert: Why we despise the Denver Broncos

After leaving Indianapolis, quarterback Peyton Manning didn’t visit the Chiefs before signing with Denver.
After leaving Indianapolis, quarterback Peyton Manning didn’t visit the Chiefs before signing with Denver. The Associated Press

This will be the easiest “why we hate” piece we write all year. If you live in Kansas City and/or root for the Chiefs, it’s not whether you despise the Denver Broncos, but how much.

This will be the easiest “why we hate” piece we write all year. If you live in Kansas City and/or root for the Chiefs, it’s not whether you despise the Denver Broncos, but how much.

Let us fan the flames of your contempt with five things we loathe about the Chiefs’ AFC West rivals.

1. Subpar Bowl

What’s the worst thing that can happen on Super Bowl Sunday, besides your favorite team getting waxed? No, it’s not running out of guacamole; it’s suffering through an utterly non-competitive 60 minutes dragged out for five hours. And the Donkeys, darlings of the national media, were simply terrible against the Seattle Seahawks, losing 55-10 … we wanted to change the channel after the first quarter, but we kept watching because we knew Broncos fans were in agony. <modify_1>.

2. Orange is the new yack

Those garish uniforms make us want to puke. Whoever thought it was a good idea to drape a National Football League team in the color hunters use to avoid putting buckshot into each other should be taken out back and, well, you know.

3. The air up there

Nothing’s more exciting than hearing broadcasters drone on about players needed to take oxygen because they’re playing at a mile above sea level. We get it. The air’s thin there.

4. Peyton’s place

This big-game choker with a disturbingly large forehead couldn’t even give Kansas City the courtesy of a visit when he was looking for his next job after leaving Indy. What. A. Loser.

5. Horse for a face

John Elway wasn’t just a prima donna who refused to sign with the Colts when he was drafted out of Stanford, he always seemed to get the best of the Chiefs. Worse, he’s now their general manager and executive vice president of football operations, a really long title for a self-important blowhard.

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