Nation & World

Lactose intolerant guy pooh-poohs Starbucks for a milk mistake — from his toilet

There’s a reason I order soy milk in my coffee, lactose intolerant Starbucks customer Demit Strato complained to the company on Monday, saying he had to go the bathroom nearly a dozen times after a barista put regular milk instead of soy milk in his coffee.
There’s a reason I order soy milk in my coffee, lactose intolerant Starbucks customer Demit Strato complained to the company on Monday, saying he had to go the bathroom nearly a dozen times after a barista put regular milk instead of soy milk in his coffee. AP file photo

Demit Strato says Starbucks got his order wrong on Monday.

It was so wrong, he Venti-ed – a Latte – on Facebook.

Strato, who lives in New York City, is lactose intolerant.

He asked for a Venti Iced Coffee with soy milk.

He got a Venti Iced Coffee with regular milk, he says.

See where this is going?

He fired off a complaint to the company – from his bathroom.

“This is the second time I ordered a Venti Iced Coffee with Soy Milk this month where the Soy Milk request was ignored and regular milk was instead used,” Strato wrote in a post on the company’s Facebook page that has gone viral.

“I’ve pooped 11 times since the A.M. My bottom hurts from all the wiping. Do you think I enjoy soy milk? Does anyone enjoy soy milk? Really? I don’t order soy (milk) because I’m bored and want my drink order to sound fancy.

“I order soy milk so that my bottom doesnt blast fire for 4 hours. I’m not a Charmander. Thank you for listening to my rant.

“P.S. I’m writing this from the comfort OF MY TOILET.”

The post has logged monster numbers on Facebook — 452,000 reactions, 107,000 comments, nearly 35,000 shares.

With a little push it could surely reach No 2 on the trending list.

Most people are having a good laugh, punctuating their comments with laughing emojis – the one with tears streaming.

Skeptics doubt Strato’s story, suggesting that surely one sip would have told him the coffee had regular, not soy milk.

But his lactose intolerant brethren feel his pain.

Oh, how they feel his pain.

One lactose intolerant commenter, though, admitted that sometimes he just throws caution to the wind.

“This is so true,” he wrote. “Sometimes I just order knowing what is to come because lets face it, whole milk makes coffee taste better, and soy is disgusting. So once in a while I order whole milk and let all hell break loose for the taste.”

Not one to miss a beat, the folks at Poo-Pourri toilet spray commented, too.

“Oh crap! We would love to send you some Poo-Pourri to help with your toilet drama,” the company wrote to Strato.

The Daily Mail reports that Starbucks, which has not commented publicly, reached out to Strato privately.

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