Hope you had a relaxing Groundhog Day. Mine was fabulous!
It’s my favorite holiday, because there’s no stress, nary a headache nor a worry in the world. I guess if you are a groundhog that might not be the case, given that the future of the weather is dependent upon your shadow.
So many holidays now are fevered with panic and self-disaster. The worst one is Christmas.
With the media joining forces with marketers by promoting Christmas merchandise every 7 1/4 seconds, the consumer is whacked over the head with new cordless, holographic, backpack vacuums that can suck up a small pachyderm with a mere glance at the button.
The frenzy stirred by December’s Black Friday has morphed into Black Month sales. Pretty soon, shoppers will create their online lists so far in advance they must designate annual presents for their little ones all the way to college graduation. How can you ever keep up with the overachievers?
Plus, Christmas cards have now turned into a stresser that can send me blasting up through the rooftop. I love receiving Christmas cards, but who has time to do these with all the required parties, Secret Santa gifting and mega-sale chasing?
Christmas wears me out.
Halloween comes next in the stress line for me. It’s just another holiday where the preparation of the haunting is daunting.
Months of planning what costume to wear and weeks of stitching have now been replaced by the art of stapling and duct-taping at my house. Heaven forbid we push our kids out the door on Halloween night, chucking a sheet over their head, while haphazardly cutting two eyes and a mouth out on your front stoop.
Halloween wears me out.
Speaking of too much candy, Valentines is the pits. Just when you have regained consciousness from Christmas, and the hoards of Halloween candy are almost digested, your sweet tooth is abruptly awakened for your sweet ones.
Luckily, after your kids are out of grade school, the amount of stress is substantially lowered for parents. After you’ve lost sleep because of making your child’s school-required artistic masterpiece of a Valentine box, glorious classroom parties, and handmade cards that would make the owners of Pinterest cry, this holiday becomes stale for many adults.
One more year for me then it’s reserved for the night before to purchase of a card, gift, or ugh ... more candy.
Valentine’s Day wears me out.
The next two on the stress meter are as follows: After the gluttonous food frenzy for which our waists are forever thankful for family and turkey trousers, the feast, which takes 2,000 hours to create, is ingested in 30 minutes.
Also, St. Patrick’s day can be stressful to those contributing to the big parade or festival, but for the rest of us it’s too much green beer and if you’re lucky ... green scrambled eggs!
All of these stressful days planning and prepping add up to approximately 3 months of the year, depending on if you skip the Christmas cards. Look at how much time I’ve been wasting on trivial holiday details.
Which leads me back to the fact that Groundhog Day is the best holiday by far. It’s a day where I wake up not clouded by required holiday details. I can pour a cup of coffee, fix my family a healthy breakfast and be grateful for the ordinary day.
Unless, you live in Punxsutawney, Penn., then it’s another party!
Stacey Hatton adores stories hearing stories about other people’s drama. Drop her a note at firstname.lastname@example.org.