Q: My boyfriend has worn panties since he was 12. We are both 20 and have been together for a year. I know it’s odd, but I’ve always thought it was cute and, admittedly, sexy. We will graduate from college next year and are thinking about our futures.
I’ve been doing some reading and am concerned that he may have some repressed tendencies. He says he does not, and gets quiet and stubborn and won’t discuss it. He always dresses as a female character for Halloween, wearing my undies. This year he went as Lady Gaga.
Are these good enough reasons to be worried? And if so, what should I do? — Tested in Tampa
A: Whether you should worry depends upon what you are worried about. I am more concerned that your boyfriend is unwilling to discuss this than what he’s wearing under his Levis.
If you’re afraid he may not be 100 percent heterosexual, you should know that some straight men wear ladies’ panties because they like the way they feel. Also, some men who enjoy cross-dressing have successful marriages to women who aren’t threatened by it and who help them do it.
Q: I would like to suggest that some wives be a little less traditional and inhibited. Lighten up! Be just a little bit more adventurous, open-minded and forward — nothing excessive, mind you. Variety, after all, is the spice of life. What husband wouldn’t enjoy an exceptionally nice surprise every once in awhile? — Wishful Thinking in Pennsylvania
A: Inhibitions can be hard to overcome. However, if YOUR wife is among those you are suggesting loosen up (etc.), you should definitely mention it to her and include your “wish list.” But don’t be shocked if she gives you one, too.
Q: I have lost my copy of the “Letter From Your Pet,” the essay that is written from the pet’s viewpoint to his master, assuring him it is the right thing to do when it is time to put the pet down. Is it included in your “Keepers” booklet? If so, how can I order a copy? — Ruth in the Villages, Fla.
A: “A Dog’s Prayer” by Beth Norman Harris is one of the most requested items that have ever appeared in my column. It addresses not only the pet’s end of life, but also how to respectfully treat the animal during its days on earth.
My “Keepers” booklet includes “A Dog’s Prayer,” as well as amusing and thought-provoking poems and essays on a variety of subjects, ranging from children and parenting, to human nature, houseguests and more.
It can be ordered by sending your name and mailing address, plus check or money order for $7 in U.S. funds, to: Dear Abby Keepers, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. Shipping and handling are included in the price. Many people have told me that “Keepers” makes a welcome gift for newlyweds, new parents, animal lovers or anyone who is recovering from an illness. Filled with humor and wisdom, it’s an inspiring, positive, quick and easy read for anyone who could use a lift.