Once you have said that you wouldn’t have minded a more modest list, Miss Manners notes that you have conceded that you do not object to this family’s dunning you. Once you accept the principle that they can help you dispose of your disposable income, you are just haggling over the price.
If such is the case, you need only ask your friend for other suggestions, in the hope that a reasonable one will slip in. But if you are as appalled as Miss Manners is at the very idea of begging for luxuries, the best rebuke is to ignore the email.
As your friend is not shy, the talking she threatens may be a demand to know why. You could tell her that you assumed that it was intended for those who had said that they planned to buy Zoe a present and had asked for suggestions.Ready for breakup? DEAR MISS MANNERS: My boyfriend and I are planning to continue our relationship long distance. He is currently away on vacation, but I noticed he is very distant and doesn’t answer my emails even when he does get them and read them. I’m feeling very lonely and don’t think we should continue with the relationship. I feel that this is what a long-distance relationship will be with him. I want to break up, but Christmas is coming and he is not returning until the 20th. I don’t know if breaking up with him then is too cruel. Should I wait until after Christmas or should I do it before? GENTLE READER:
What if he comes back excited to see you, bemoans the unreliability of email and hints at the wonderful Christmas present he got you?
Miss Manners is just checking whether yours is a momentary pique, or a sign that you really want out. In either case, you should lead up to it immediately, by saying that the separation made you realize that the long-distance plan will not work for you. Should he convince you otherwise, you may both still have a pleasant Christmas. If not, you will have saved you both from exchanging and then returning presents.© Universal Uclick 12/17