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Wait quietly to see how this plays out — not that you have any other choice. Miss Manners appreciates your distaste for snobbery and your family’s pride in self-achievement, but your niece is an adult and must develop her values for herself.
You have no way of knowing how these people will treat her, if, indeed, she can manage to see them. (Whatever their nationality, people who hold high government positions or are rich know how to protect themselves from strangers who claim to be long-lost relatives.) In that case, or if they just snub her, as you imagine, she may be cured of her princess fantasy.
Another possibility is that they may die laughing at her belief that having their name on a castle, which may or may not be in the family’s possession, means that they are royal.
But suppose they are welcoming? If they are, as you say, prominent in government and business, your niece will get a whole new lesson in respect for personal achievement. Aristocrats are not assured a free ride in the modern world, and she may well learn about New World values from the Old World.Don’t make a mess for dining staff DEAR MISS MANNERS: When we’re out, my husband places his cloth napkin over his plate when he is finished eating. Is this ever proper? It doesn’t bother me, but I am just curious. GENTLE READER:
Has your husband confused this situation with the custom of drawing a sheet over a dead body for decency’s sake? Miss Manners is just curious.
What dining decency requires instead is that he spare the waiter and the person who does the laundry from dealing with the mess that that must make.© Universal Uclick 9/4