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Since debt collectors are calling because your son isn’t paying his bills, do not co-sign for a loan for him! If you do, you could wind up having to pay it off yourselves.
Your son is an adult. That you are his mother does not obligate you to assume responsibility in case he doesn’t pay his bills. If he retaliates by not allowing you to see the grandkids, so be it. If you knuckle under to emotional blackmail, it won’t stop, and it could affect your standard of living for the rest of your lives.Talk through grief DEAR ABBY: I’m in high school and my dad just passed away. I want to know why I have so much anger and hurt about this. I feel like he never got to see me reach any of my goals in life. The main goal was to see my graduation.
I am sorry for your loss, which is a particularly difficult one at your age.
It’s important that you understand the feelings you are experiencing are normal. Anger is a part of the grieving process, and it may take some time for you to get beyond it.
The best way to “get your mind off this” would be to find a safe place to talk about it. A grief support group would be helpful. Your clergyperson could help you find one and so could your family doctor.
Good for you! You taught your children that there were consequences for shirking responsibility. That’s an important lesson because the same is true when they become adults.Who’s lucky? DEAR ABBY: I was wondering, do you ever read a letter and say to yourself, “If this is all you have to worry about, you’re lucky”? — Jeff in Fort McCoy, Fla. DEAR JEFF:
No. I have more respect for my readers than that. However, many people have written me to say that after reading the letters that appear in my column, they felt lucky!© Universal Uclick 7/18