Stargazing

Whatever, Martha Stewart: The mother only a daughter can mock

Here's our Mother's Day confession: We are addicted to the Fine Living Network show called "Whatever, Martha!"

If you've never seen it, catch the mini-marathon Sunday - Mother's Day - from 2 to 4:30 p.m.

In "Mystery Science Theater" fashion,

Alexis Stewart
Martha Stewart
Jennifer Koppelman Hutt

watch old episodes of "Martha Stewart Living" and make commentary - snarky, funny, biting asides that you might think yourself but would never say out loud.

They mock the way Martha is with children (imperious), the way she acts around certain men (flirtatious) and how excited she gets about placing forks and spoons correctly in the dishwasher (delirious).

Three brand-new episodes will air during Sunday's mini-marathon, including a look at Martha using one of Alexis' recipes to make cookies, a look at various shows with guest

Rosie O'Donnell

and an episode where Martha learns chest exercises.

(We hope it's not as weird as the exercises to do in bed first thing in the morning she once demonstrated. We never knew you could "exercise" your eyeballs.)

The show's new season begins in June. Watch a couple of snippets below, one on Martha's version of S'mores - she actually sands down the stick - and another demonstrating ugly (Sorry, Martha!) face-painting.

But first, the Washington Post recently caught up with Martha herself and asked her a "Whatever, Martha!"-related question and about her new affection for Twitter.

Post

: Your daughter, Alexis, and pal Jennifer Koppelman Hutt, who do the Fine Living cable show Whatever, Martha!, did an online poll asking if someone was going to visit you, Martha Stewart, which item would they take as a hostess gift: homemade brownies, a bottle of the finest wine, fresh flowers from their garden, or a store-bought cake? The flowers got the most votes online, but what would be your choice?

Martha

: My choice would be a bottle of wine. If you bring flowers, it's like bringing coals to Newcastle. I have more flowers than most people. I certainly don't need a cake; I would be making the cake. Brownies? No.

Post

: What do you bring to hosts?

Martha

: I bring a dozen fresh eggs. I take them honey from my beehive, homemade jams and jellies from my own fruit, a big basket of garden vegetables I grow. If I have been doing my own candlemaking, I may take them six candles that I have made. I recently made a lot of pillows and children's toys. I have the added benefits of doing crafts on a daily basis.

It should always be joyful to be able to make things. Too many of us are sitting around Twittering. How about knitting? Knit me a sweater or a scarf.

Post

: But wait a minute, you're big on Twitter now!

Martha

: I don't Twitter more than 10 minutes a day. I like Twitter because it's really experimental. I try to embrace any new technology so I can see why it's so appealing. I am very inquisitive and very curious.

Post

: How do you manage to do all this Twittering and blogging with everything else you do?

Martha

: I have a BlackBerry and iPhone and a regular cell phone, and I carry all of these around with me. There are laptops everywhere I go, so I don't carry one.

| Lisa Gutierrez, The Star


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