Don't Kill The Mellinger

January 7, 2014

Twitter Tuesday: Chiefs anger, paranoia, depression, defeatism (plus Royals, KU, KSU and Mizzou)

We're going to do it a little differently this week. I'm typing this from my iPad (like I did for the game on Saturday) which makes it a huge pain in the neck to do the embedding or even copy-and-paste from Twitter. Same with hyperlinks. Basically, this is a beta version of Twitter Tuesday, because everything in my life, apparently, is working as well as the Chiefs in the playoffs.

Don't Kill the Mellinger

Columnist Sam Mellinger's thoughts on sports and other important stuff

So first the computer broke. Wouldn't start up, wouldn't open anything, wouldn't serve as anything useful other than maybe a big paperweight. Then the blizzard hits Indianapolis, and we have to drive out of there: me, Randy and Terez (Vahe pulled an all-nighter the night before and understandably didn't want any part of it), four hours to St. Louis, then around six more home, through the blizzard, past the cars in the ditches, hoping we weren't going to end up like them.

Then the pipes burst at home, and I hear the ol' laptop is unsalvageable, two long-term projects I think you guys would've liked either garbage or now needing to be started over.

My last few days, then, have basically been like the Chiefs in the second half.

So with that in mind, the eating recommendation is whatever makes the pain go away, and the reading recommendation is whatever you want it to be.

We're going to do it a little differently this week. I'm typing this from my iPad (like I did for the game on Saturday) which makes it a huge pain in the neck to do the embedding or even copy-and-paste from Twitter. Same with hyperlinks. Basically, this is a beta version of Twitter Tuesday, because everything in my life, apparently, is working as well as the Chiefs in the playoffs.

So you're just going to have to trust me that these are actual tweets from actual people. I'll include their handles here so you know for sure.

From @Password_isTaco: Why? #TwitterTuesday

This is going to hurt, you guys...

From @kiphillreporter: #TT Why?

... let it hurt together.

From: @ScottyByNature After that loss Dumb Dumber couldn't even put a smile on my face. Why us?


From @KirschnerCK: Is it safe to move from the fetal position yet? #TwitterTuesday

Take it slow.

From @gavinesq: It's more than bad luck, Shuttlecocks and monsters around corners. They've turned me into an endless font of simmering rage. #tt

Midwesterners Gone Wild.

From @B_Fischer4 When Mizzou won, I KNEW the Chiefs would lose. In no way did I think we could have 2 nice things. Why us?

That should be a ridiculous thing to say. SHOULD be. It is not and, well...

From: @cjsauer: I'm sure I'm not the only KC fan who thought a 28 point lead wasn't going to be enough.

... see what I mean?

From @gregoravey: That was rough. Most gut punch loss in the history of the franchise? #tt @mellinger

It's the worst one of my conscious being as a sports fan. The No Punt Game, you lost to one of the great quarterbacks in NFL history, and you knew the team's defense stunk all year. The Lin Elliott game, nobody played well that day. Bono threw three picks, Derrick Thomas wasn't much of a factor, and the weather. Oh, the weather.

Now, we can argue the Christmas Day game, or more accurately, YOU can argue it because that was long before I was born but I did have a conversation with a Chiefs fan who was around back then who said this one was worse.

Hey, like Len Dawson told Covitz after the game on Saturday, "We wouldn't have lost that football game."

From @a_dorsey03: My son is 15 months old. I don't want him to feel this Kansas City sports curse pain. Any suggestions?

Just make sure he has hobbies. And a sense of humor.

From: @ConnaghanGross: I like you, Sam, but if those shuttlecocks get damaged by some drunk, idiot football fan, I might not be able to forgive you.

That's fine, but then I'm blaming you for my computer and these busted pipes.


From: @TheFakeNed: #TT do the Chiefs lose that many guys to concussion in one game if they aren't facing multiple lawsuits surrounding head injuries?

I don't have any way of knowing this, of course. And there is actually some evidence to suggest there is some smoke to what you're saying here -- I might get into this later in the week -- but I would be surprised. I think the Chiefs are following NFL protocol here, and the circumstance with what seems like a billion lawsuits against the Chiefs for head injuries (in itself a coincidence because of a law specific to Missouri that provides the loophole) is a coincidence.

But you can't help but wonder.

From @JimmyKegin: So distraught, anything we can hang our hats on? Besides the usual "it was a great season for the Chiefs" crap?

Like I said in the column, the ONLY way the Chiefs could've screwed up one of the great turnarounds in NFL history was to screw up their playoff game like that.

We can talk about Jamaal Charles being great, Alex Smith being worth the trade, certain stars on the defense emerging ... that's fine, but what does it mean?

I can't imagine anyone will remember this season for the great turnaround unless it's in the context of, "Yeah, that was that year they had the great turnaround and then defecated their pants in the playoffs right?"

From: @TbobSmith Is there any amount of Peanut wings or Okey Joes Z-mans to make this all go away?

Well, I guess that's one way to heal your heart from damage watching your team: punish it with damage from delicious food.

From: @jjcoops11: Which injury do you think hurt the Chiefs the most?

The answer should be Jamaal Charles, because he's the Chiefs' best and most important player and it's not particularly close, but if you watched the game I think it's Brandon Flowers -- in itself a weird thing because Flowers had a pretty crappy year, all things considered.

But when Flowers was in the game, the Chiefs had trouble covering T.Y. Hilton. When he was gone, they didn't have a prayer covering him.

I mean, as good as Charles is, the Chiefs still scored 44 points. That has to be enough to win. Just has to be.

From: @JimmyKegin #twittertuesday Not too early for draft talk and FA needs is it? Priorities in your opinion? CB, S and then WR IMHO

The secondary was just atrocious, especially free safety. The definitely could use another cornerback or two (Dunta Robinson is going to be cut, you have to think). What the Chiefs think they have in Sanders Commings will impact where they go in the secondary. And Alex Smith needs some help, too. Receivers and tight ends, and just like with Commings, what the Chiefs think they have in Kelce will impact where they go here.

They have a lot of needs for an 11-5 team, which tells you something.

From: @neilcarnes40: After a couple days, do you think the Star's headline was in good taste?

I thought it was the best headline we've had in the sports section since I've been here, and that's been since 2000. And I should say I've HATED some of our headlines (in particular, WHO LET THE DOGS OUT? after the Chiefs won a game they were expected to lose).

From: @kcnickmccabe: I'm guessing you had a totally different column largely written Saturday. What was it like? #Wistful #TT

I wish I could remember who it was, and I'm not entirely sure if he's serious, but there's a sports writer, somewhere, who once mentioned the idea of gathering up all the wasted and in hindsight silly sports writing done on deadlines that become cyber-junk after the ball goes through Bill Buckner's legs or Ray Allen hits a three from the corner or David Tyree catches a ball with his helmet.

Anyway, you're right. I did start writing when the Chiefs went up 38-10. I don't know if this is what I would've filed -- I'd like to think I would've edited it and made it sound better -- but, whatever, here is a very rough draft:

"INDIANAPOLIS -- The New Chiefs are at their best in the playoffs. The New Chiefs are perfect decisions from Alex Smith, hard running by Dwayne Bowe, pressure from the pass rushers and the cornerbacks and a barrel full of what the kids call swag.

The New Chiefs hear the worst kind of news -- Jamaal Charles has a concussion -- and they play their best game in at least a few years anyway.

The New Chiefs have left The Old Chiefs back in 1995 and 2003, in grainy video with huge shoulder pads that look outdated and a heartbreak than now feels the same.

The New Chiefs are the shock of the first day of these NFL playoffs, XX-XX winners over Colts here, and all of a sudden all those Lin Elliott and Peyton Manning and Matt Cassel defeatism ..."

And that's when the Colts scored that touchdown in like four seconds, and even if it was still 31-17, well, I stopped writing.

From: @Thuettenmueller: I'm too depressed to think of a question to ask you. Ask yourself one and answer it, please.

When the Chiefs were winning, how many phone calls or emails did you get from people taunting you about picking the Colts to win?

I haven't gone through them all just yet, but at least two emails and three phone calls.

From @shannonfoster21 So, #kuball went 9-4 in non-con and has brutal 5-game stretch to open Big 12 play. Time to panic yet? Will they figure it out?

They're not as good as they should be, but I still think they're going to be fine. San Diego State is a lot better than people might think, especially defensively. Now, that being said, Self was right to say "we got what we deserved," because they basically got their butts kicked. Andrew Wiggins needs to play up to his talent, Tarik Black needs to find it, Naadir Tharpe needs to actually lead instead of play the role of leader, it would help if Wayne Selden could figure it out, and the Jayhawks need to play through Wiggins and Embiid, always.

I still think they're a 3-seed, at worst, and should be the (slight) favorites in the Big 12 because ...

From @ksubmac: How much did Cobbins injury really affect OkState? Still a great win for #KState right?

Absolutely. I was in the car and missed the game, so I'm not going to speak specifically about the game but these are all true: - Cobbins going down is a big blow to Oklahoma State, makes them worse, and changes how they play.

- They'll get better adjusting to life without him as the games go on, no matter how crappy of a coach Travis Ford is.

- Oklahoma State still has the best player in the conference, and it's very weak if they use the injury as an excuse.

From @GrantsRants3 with QB situation, skill positions returning, and favorable schedule, should Mizzou be the favorite to win SEC next year?

I haven't gotten into looking at who everyone has back, but especially on offense, Mizzou is farly loaded. The way they played, too, this has the look of something sustainable, something real. If you watched them these past two seasons in the SEC, I think fair-minded people would say 5-7 with all the injuries was the fluke, not this past season.

From @HalfwayToHobo *tentatively raises hand* I have a question about the Royals' pitching staff. *gets pelted with vegetables* #TwitterTuesday

I believe there are just 38 days until pitchers and catchers report.

From @wizardOfOsie how are the Royals going to top the chiefs in terms of disappointment at the end of their season?

Kansas City.

From @justin_baker88: if royals go into a one game playoff I'm certain we lose to a walk-off grand slam that ends Holland's MLB saves record 1 short #TT

Kansas City!

From @bradassremy: Will I ever witness a Kansas City chiefs/Royals playoff victory? I recently turned 23. #tt

I'm more optimistic than most, probably. I think the Royals had a very good offseason and are well positioned to make the playoffs in 2014. I think the Chiefs can be right back in the playoffs with the right moves, and I like John Dorsey and Andy Reid's ability to make the right moves.

But I also watched them blow an unblowable lead last weekend, understand that the windows on many of the stars are closing so, well, it wouldn't hurt to eat right and exercise just in case.

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