Independence Day is almost here — time to show a little patriotism. Budweiser beer just renamed itself “America,” for heaven’s sake. If a Belgian brewing company can do that, the least you can do is show you’re a well-educated citizen. Let’s see whether you’ve been keeping up with the presidential race:
1. Since endorsing Donald Trump for president, Chris Christie …
A. Tracked down the man he once chased down the boardwalk while waving an ice cream cone and apologized.
B. Got the support of a full 18 percent of New Jersey voters on whether Trump should pick Christie as his running mate.
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C. Told reporters he does not want to be the vice-presidential nominee because “really, my life is ruined already.”
2. When Marco Rubio ran for president, he made it clear he was done with being a senator forever. (“I have only said like 10,000 times I will be a private citizen in January.”) Last month he …
A. Told reporters he was pursuing a lifelong dream of playing defensive back for the Miami Dolphins.
B. Said he was running for re-election because “I’ve discovered I’m not worth nearly as much money as I thought in the private sector.”
C. Said he was running for re-election because, “Control of the Senate may very well come down to the race in Florida.”
3. After the demise of his presidential campaign, Ben Carson joined the Trump team. When his candidate claimed a federal judge was biased due to his Mexican heritage, Carson said that Trump …
A. “Was probably talking out loud rather than thinking.”
B. Believes all jurists should be examined for “the fruit salad of their life.”
C. Has many good Mexican friends among the caddies at his golf courses.
4. Paul Ryan began June by endorsing Donald Trump for president. Since then, he’s denounced several of the candidate’s more outrageous statements. When asked how many times he could do this without washing his hands of the whole campaign, Ryan said …
B. “I don’t know the answer to that, either.”
C. “Did I tell you I saw John Boehner in Florida? God, that man looks happy.”
5. Duncan Hunter of California, one of the first members of Congress to endorse Donald Trump, announced he’s going to stop trying to answer for things the candidate says. But he’s still on the Trump bandwagon because …
A. “Everybody makes mistakes.”
B. “Him talking about things and saying things about things is different than him saying what he’s going to do.”
C. “Hell, I don’t know. Go ask Paul Ryan.”
6. After he dropped out of the Republican race, Sen. Lindsey Graham endorsed Ted Cruz, whom he loathes. Then when Cruz dropped out, he …
A. Endorsed William Howard Taft, noting, “He’s dead, but nobody’s perfect.”
B. Said he’d “probably write somebody in or just skip the presidential.”
C. Compared the current campaign to “Game of Thrones” and announced that it was “time for a woman president, but only if it’s Daenerys the Dragon Queen.”
7. Bernie Sanders’ biggest post-primary news was that …
A. He’s going to endorse Hillary Clinton (but that doesn’t mean he’ll vote for her).
B. He’s going to vote for Hillary Clinton (but that doesn’t mean he’s endorsing her).
C. He needs to take one more look at Martin O’Malley.
8. When Britain voted to exit the European Union, Donald Trump was visiting his golf course in Turnberry, Scotland. Asked for his analysis of the big event, Trump said …
A. “You know, when the pound goes down, more people are coming to Turnberry, frankly.”
B. “Analysts have drastically overstated the impact on the British economy; we will of course have to keep a close eye on the manufacturing sector.”
C. “Vote? What vote?”
9. A former White House Secret Service officer has written a tell-all book about the Clintons in which he claims to have seen evidence that Hillary once …
A. Broke a law.
B. Broke a promise.
C. Broke a vase.
10. Campaigning in New York, Hillary Clinton demonstrated she had lost some of her old city sophistication when she …
A. Had trouble getting into the subway.
B. Made eye contact with a fellow passenger in the subway.
C. Posed for a selfie in front of Trump Tower.
11. When Clinton made her big speech on foreign policy last month, people couldn’t help noticing that she appeared on stage in front of…
A. Huge pictures of Abraham Lincoln, Oprah Winfrey and the pope.
B. Her grandchildren.
C. 19 American flags.
Answers: 1-B, 2-C. 3-A, 4-B, 5-B, 6-B, 7-B, 8-A, 9-C, 10-A, 11-C