Don’t be held prisoner by past mistakes

03/18/2014 5:51 PM

03/18/2014 5:51 PM

DEAR BILLY GRAHAM: Our marriage broke up a year ago because of my husband’s unfaithfulness, and yet I’ve been overwhelmed with guilt ever since. Why do I feel this way? — N.M.

DEAR N.M.:

Recently, someone told me about an article they’d read suggesting that divorce was a painless solution to most marriage difficulties. But it simply isn’t true — as you’ve discovered.

Even when divorce looks like the best solution, it almost always brings with it an unexpected harvest of anger, loneliness, financial burdens, depression and even guilt. I don’t know if your marriage could have been saved, but perhaps your letter will cause some to rethink their plans to get divorced, and seek instead — with God’s help — to keep their marriage together. No wonder Jesus said concerning marriage, “Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate” (Mark 10:9).

Why do you feel guilty? Perhaps down inside you know you could have done more — right from the beginning — to make your marriage work. Did you do everything you possibly could to make your home a happy and loving place? This isn’t to excuse your husband for what he did; it was very wrong. But in any marriage both spouses need to work to make their home a place of peace and fulfillment.

Learn from the past, but don’t be a prisoner to it. Instead, seek God’s forgiveness for any ways you might have failed, and put your life and your future into Christ’s hands. God loves you, and your life will never be the same once you realize it. Invite Christ into your life today. The Bible says, “Blessed are those who have learned to walk in the light of your presence, Lord” (Psalm 89:15).

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