DEAR ABBY: I was engaged several years ago, but the engagement didn’t last. We broke up, and I gave him back his ring. We remain close friends, however, and hang out at least once a week.
I have been dating another guy for a couple of years, and we’re thinking about getting engaged. I am wondering if it would be improper to ask my ex if we could buy my old ring from him. It was — and still is — my “dream ring,” and I know my ex has kept it in the glove box of his car ever since I gave it back to him.
I don’t want to commit a faux pas, but it seems silly to buy another identical ring. What do you think? — Headed Down the Aisle
DEAR HEADED DOWN THE AISLE: If you haven’t discussed this with your current boyfriend, you should. It might bother him to see you wearing an engagement ring that was given to you by someone else.
If he says it’s OK, I can’t see why you shouldn’t ask your former fiance if he’d be willing to part with it. Frankly, he might be glad to get the money.
Wild man in love
DEAR ABBY: I have a love problem I could use your help with. I go to college, and I met an amazing girl, “Lorena,” here. She’s very religious, which I like about her. We have been talking, but I’m afraid to ask her out. I don’t have the best morals, and I’m afraid I would corrupt her if we did go out. I don’t want to make her into something she isn’t.
Should I let her be who she is or take the risk of dating her and hope she’ll be happy? When I think about Lorena, I realize I’d do anything for her — even change my life. Please tell me what to do. — Wild Man in Kent, Ohio
DEAR WILD MAN: Feeling as you do about Lorena, I think you should take the risk and ask her out. Because you would do “anything” for her, make it your top priority not to push her into anything you know wouldn’t be good for her. You wouldn’t be the first “wild man” to meet someone who made him want to be a better man. I wish you luck.
Bring in the mail?
DEAR ABBY: I am a woman in my 50s. My sister, who is also in her 50s, lives with me and has for several years. Could you please settle a dispute we are having?
She says that mail is private and when I bring my mail in from the mailbox, I should leave hers in the box. I say it is just common courtesy to bring all of it in at once and place it in a predetermined spot for the recipient.
I am not saying that mail is not private, because it is. And I would never dream of opening anyone’s mail, but don’t you have to look at the envelope to know which person it belongs to?
So what do you think? Should it be left in the box or should I bring it all in? — Stumped Sister in Houston
DEAR SISTER: I think what you have been doing is both wise and prudent. Unless the mailbox has a lock on it, I would recommend bringing all the mail into the house as soon as possible after it’s delivered to prevent theft.
However, because your sister is sensitive about it and asked that you leave it in the box for her to retrieve, you should do as she has requested.
Write Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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