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Posted on Sat, Oct. 10, 2009 10:15 PM
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‘30 Rock’ is too poor, ‘Million’ too rich, Joan Baez just right.

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We are devoting this column to the finer things in life — because isn’t that what television is supposed to be, an escape from the recessions of our humdrum existence, a stimulus package for the cost of a monthly cable bill?

Let’s start with “30 Rock,” airing 8:30 p.m. Thursday on KSHB. Winner of three straight Emmys, it can fairly be called the finest sitcom on the air today. But after 58 episodes, 580 rave reviews from critics and 5,800 Judah Friedlander trucker caps, even a devoted “30 Rock” watcher like me will admit it is not always on its “A” game.

What’s surprising is that most shows will open the season strong, but Thursday’s Season 4 premiere is one of the weakest “30 Rocks” I’ve seen.

It begins with everyone’s favorite corporate villain, Jack Donaghy (Alec Baldwin), informing Liz Lemon (Tina Fey) that she and her crew have lost touch with “the real America” and must work on improving relations with the heartland by eating lousy fast food, talking to janitors and digging country music.

Perhaps because this is a shopworn premise for “30 Rock” — which has always mined class differences and cultural resentments for laughs — or maybe because the whole episode had a kind of flop-sweat franticness to it, I found it boring. (An appearance by Steve Buscemi, who is woefully miscast as a corporate henchman, doesn’t help matters.)

So let’s move on to “Million Dollar Listing” (10 p.m. Monday, Bravo), where three man-tastic young agents are trying to sell fine homes in Southern California. Last year, the show’s second season aired just as the market was collapsing, an unfortunate accident of timing to say the least.

You might think that the folks who run Bravo would have put this reality show on the shelf for a while in deference to, well, reality. Even the so-called Fine Living Network now refers to itself as simply “FLN” and has begun airing reruns of that middle-class favorite, “The Biggest Loser.”

However, it seems no shock to the system will release Bravo from its infatuation with high earners and their luxury lifestyles. So we get another season with the boys whose commissions are often higher than what I paid for my house.

Madison, the least robotic of the “Million Dollar” agents, meets a customer at a Rolls-Royce showroom to talk about snapping up properties at lowball prices. The customer quotes Warren Buffett: “You want to be greedy when people are scared.” The encounter clearly unsettles Madison, who has often behaved as though he lived in a wonderland of toy homes selling for cartoon prices.

And he’s not alone. “I’ve been selling real estate for 11 years — I’ve never seen a down market,” complains Chad, the fussy moptop who seems to be forever checking his hair in the mirror.

Grooming, and lack of business, leads Chad to a $1.4 million property owned by his skinologist, who mentions it while laser-treating his back to the smoothness of a gourd. Chad thinks this will be a walk in the park. He takes the cameras on a tour, showing the little touches he has added to “Chaderize their house” for a quick sale. And then he sits in the living room for hours, waiting for someone to come by.

In desperation, Chad adds a buffet to his next open house to lure potential buyers. He chooses a trendy caterer and spends more than I did on my wedding reception. “Nothing is too good for Chad,” he declares — well, except for using the first person.

Posted on Sat, Oct. 10, 2009 10:15 PM
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