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It’s not over until we say it’s over!
And the fantasy season can’t be over until we engage in our annual rite of self-flagellation, where we examine the roster we could have assembled had we made all the right moves during our draft just four short months ago. So at the risk of spontaneously combusting, let's take one last look at what could have been with our highly controversial, often-imitated, never-duplicated Perfect Draft: The Final Cut.
As always, we start with a few key assumptions:
1. We're playing in a 10-team league using a standard scoring system that starts one quarterback, two running backs, three wide receivers, one tight end, one kicker and one team defense.
2. We will draft from the fifth position in a snake format, meaning Adrian Peterson and Brian Westbrook won’t available for our first pick.
3. The preseason average draft position (ADP) of each player – according to multiple mock draft sites during the last week of August 2008 – is used to determine the most valuable selections in each round.
4. Week 17 performances are disregarded – all statistics quoted below cover the first 16 weeks – and production during the fantasy playoffs (Weeks 14 through 16) is given extra weight, both positively and negatively; and...
5. Since every draft plays out differently, we'll need a little luck along the way.
And finally, in the spirit of good sportsmanship, our goal is nothing short of total domination and the abject humiliation of our opponents.
Now, with the fifth pick of the 2008 Fantasy Draft, we should have selected…
Round 1: Larry Fitzgerald, WR, Cardinals. Yeah, I know we’ll hear snickers on draft night for reaching a round early, but we’ll be laughing all the way to the bank as others waste their first-rounder on the likes of Joseph Addai, Marshawn Lynch and Tom Brady. The fact is, once Peterson and Westbrook are off the board, no one offers more value in this slot than the NFL’s top wideout. Most important, selecting him now enables us to secure the leading passer with our next pick. Near-perfect pick: Clinton Portis, RB, Redskins.
Round 2. Drew Brees, QB, Saints. We can’t have a Perfect Draft without the 2008 Fantasy MVP! Brees’ 4,683 passing yards and 30 TDs through Week 16 will anchor our roster all season long. Near-perfect pick: Fitzgerald.
Round 3. Michael Turner, RB, Falcons. Who needs AP? Our patience in tapping the RB pool is rewarded when the No. 2 tailback in Fantasyland falls into our lap. Near-perfect pick: Brandon Jacobs, RB, Giants.
Round 4. Anquan Boldin, WR, Cardinals: Two receivers from the same team? Absolutely! Boldin’s 11 TDs tied with Randy Moss for the league lead, despite playing in three fewer games. Near-perfect pick: Thomas Jones, RB, Jets. Round 5. Calvin Johnson, WR, Lions: We’re now armed with three of the top four fantasy receivers on the planet. Yahtzee! Near-perfect pick: Brandon Marshall, WR, Broncos.
Round 6. Tony Gonzalez, TE, Chiefs: The future Hall of Famer outpaced his younger counterparts with the most receptions, receiving yards and TDs, despite teaming with the motley crew of Damon Huard, Brodie Croyle and Tyler Thigpen. Near-perfect pick: Greg Jennings, WR, Packers.
Round 7. Roddy White, WR, Falcons: It hurts allowing Matt Forte, the remarkably consistent fantasy Rookie of the Year, to go to a rival; but since we passed up Jennings in the previous round, we can’t afford to let another elite receiver slide by. Near-perfect pick: Matt Forte, RB, Bears.
Round 8. DeAngelo Williams, RB, Panthers: He got off to a slow start, but beginning with his breakout game in Week 5, Williams was fantasy gold. Teaming him with Turner gives us the most formidable backfield tandem in the business. Near-perfect pick: Jay Cutler, QB, Broncos.
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