DEAR ABBY: I have been with my boyfriend off and on for nine years. When I moved to San Francisco, we separated for a year, until he decided he wanted to move here.
By JEANNE PHILLIPS
He has been miserable and depressed since he came. He misses his family and friends. His salary doesnt go as far here, so hes always short of money. He has also had a string of bad luck speeding tickets, car repairs, a stolen bike and a back injury. He says hell move back East soon if things dont get better, and its making me anxious. He does nothing to turn around his problems.
How can I help him realize it takes time for a new city to feel like home and lessen my anxiety over his problems? Anxious in the Bay Area
DEAR ANXIOUS: Your boyfriend does not appear to be anywhere near as adaptable as you are. You didnt mention how long he has been in California, but if its longer than six months and hes still homesick, you may have a life-changing decision ahead of you. Would you rather live in his world than live without him in San Francisco? Even if your hearts in San Francisco, his does not appear to be.
I love you quota?
DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend of nearly a year and I recently said I love you for the first time. Before he said it (he said it first) he told me he doesnt want to start saying it all the time wherein lies my dilemma. How often is too often? Do I say it every night before bed or only on special occasions?
Please help because Im confused, and Im worrying that Im hurting him because I havent said it since that night four days ago. I dont want to smother him or make him feel uncomfortable. How Much Is Too Much?
DEAR HOW MUCH: Not everyone is comfortable with verbal declarations of love, and your boyfriend may be one of them. Love is spontaneous, its a feeling, not a mathematical formula. Only your boyfriend can tell you how often is too often for him.
However, if you are sharing a bed, you should be able to express yourself fully whenever you climb into it, and his reaction should be positive (if not reciprocal) when you do.
She doesnt want yours
DEAR ABBY: I am far from flat-chested (Im a happy B-cup), but you wouldnt call me well-endowed. My question is, why is it that friends and family members who have larger breasts constantly ask me if I would like some of theirs? I think its rude and, quite frankly, embarrassing. I would never turn the tables and say, Im feeling a little skinny. Could I have some of your fat? What do I say when asked? Perfectly Fine in Evanston, Wyo.
DEAR PERFECTLY FINE: A few responses come to mind, but none that Id print in a family newspaper. My advice is to keep it simple and nonconfrontational. Smile and say, No thanks, Im happy just the way I am!
P.S. In my opinion, a B-cup is well-endowed.
© Universal Uclick 10/10
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