DEAR READERS: To all of you who are observing Memorial Day with me, please join in reflecting for a moment on those members of our armed forces who have sacrificed their lives in service to our country. Bless their spirits, and may they live forever in our hearts.
By JEANNE PHILLIPS
DEAR ABBY: My wife revealed on my 60th birthday two days ago that she has $10,000 in cash hidden in our house. She said she secretly took the money from my pay and consulting checks and hid it when we were going through a bad period in our marriage 10 years ago and nearly divorced.
I told her there is no rational reason for keeping that much money in the house. She says shes keeping it for an emergency, and it makes her feel secure. When I said we should invest the money, she got upset.
I cant understand why anyone would want to keep that much cash in the house. Whats your view? Living in Fort Knox
DEAR LIVING: To understand your wifes motivation, look back 10 years to the time when she may have felt shed need the money to get a new start. Thats the emergency the money was salted away for.
I agree that $10,000 is a lot of cash to keep in the house. Most of it should be in the bank, with only a portion in the house so it will be immediately available if needed. Unless your wife feels your marriage is still shaky, I cant see why she wouldnt compromise. Could that be her reason?
DEAR ABBY: I am a 15-year-old girl with a good life. There are bumps in the road, but they happen and I accept that. The thing I worry about is my grandmother. Shes getting very old and thinks she will be dying soon.
I try to tell her not to think that way. I really love her and dont know what I would do if she were gone so soon. I go to her house every summer, winter and anytime were out of school.
I need to get a job this summer, and I dont know how to tell my grandma I wont be coming to visit without hurting her feelings. She is one of those people who dont show their emotions like most of my family, so I know when she sometimes says its OK it really isnt. Please tell me what to say to her. Concerned Grandchild in Alabama
DEAR CONCERNED GRANDCHILD: You are sweet, thoughtful and sensitive, but you are also growing up. Your grandmother may be talking the way she is because of her age or she may be concerned about her health and trying to prepare you.
Its time to ask your parents what is going on with her. If shes really sick, you may want to postpone getting that job until next summer. If shes not, you should explain to Grandma that you love her and treasure the special times you have been able to spend with her but as much as youd like to, you will not be able to do it this summer because you need to get a job. Its part of becoming an adult and will help you to learn responsibility and independence. As a loving grandparent, she knows how important that is for you.
Recycled birthday wishes
DEAR ABBY: I am a hairdresser, and one of my clients who considers herself to be my good friend handed me a birthday card. Stuck on the envelope was a sticky note with my name written on it, covering whatever name was underneath. On the card, under Happy Birthday was her signature again on a sticky note. She said she thought the card was funny and too good not to use again, so I should pass it on, too.
I am hurt and insulted. Am I taking this too seriously? I want my OWN birthday card! Shocked in Florida
DEAR SHOCKED: Your client was trying to be thoughtful, or she wouldnt have remembered it was your birthday. Be grateful for what you got. She didnt mean to insult you in a weird way she was trying to do you a favor.
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