•“American Horror Story” (FX, 9 p.m. Oct. 5). After watching the disjointed, button-pushing, overcaffeinated pilot of this thriller from “Glee” producers Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk, I was mystified — and mesmerized. Dylan McDermott and Connie Britton play a married couple with a troubled teen and a mortgage on a haunted house.
Faster than you can say, “All work and no play make Jack a dull boy,” their world becomes a funhouse of double visions, bizarro neighbors (hello Jessica Lange!) and classic horror-movie references (“The Shining,” “Don’t Look Now”). Say what you will about Murphy — whose last FX show was the sometimes brilliant, often frustrating “Nip/Tuck” — but he knows how to get your attention. “American Horror Story” may burst into flames after a couple of episodes, but for now it is the sensation of the fall season. Verdict: Watch it.•“Suburgatory” (ABC, 7:30 p.m. Sept. 28). “It’s like the Million Mom March — the place is crawling with them,” observes Tessa, the 16-going-on-30-year-old girl on her bewildered first impressions of the ’burbs. Played by Jane Levy, who kind of looks like she’s 30, Tessa has been transported to this strange land from her native urban habitat by her freaked-out single dad (Jeremy Sisto) after he finds condoms in her bedroom. TV has a long tradition of maladjusted teenager shows, and like the best of them (“My So-Called Life,” “Daria”), “Suburgatory” has a voice that is both fresh and familiar. Sisto, already one of TV’s most versatile actors now adds clueless bachelor dad to his résumé with aplomb. Cheryl Hines and Ana Gasteyer add star power as Wisteria Lane-worthy moms on the prowl for a new hubby. Verdict: Watch it.•“The X Factor” (Fox, 7 p.m. Sept. 21). The UK version of this reality-singing competition, in which the judges serve as mentors to the talent, certainly justifies Simon Cowell’s decision to leave “Idol” and bring this franchise to the States. But success is less certain now that (a) “The Voice” has gotten on the air first and proved a huge hit for NBC and (b) “Idol” has proven it can get along fine without Simon. Verdict: Watch it. •“Free Agents” (NBC, premieres 9:30 p.m. Wednesday; time slot will move to 7:30 p.m.). Something got lost in the translation of this workplace sex comedy from the British original. Two co-workers fall in bed after losing their mates, then try to sort it out away from their crazy office. The UK version was raunchier but also had more heart than this one. Still, Kathryn Hahn and Hank Azaria are an appealing if unlikely couple, and this may wind up working for me. Verdict: Needs work.•“Revenge” (ABC, 9 p.m. Sept. 21). Emily VanCamp — at 21 a veteran TV role player, with “Everwood” and “Brothers & Sisters” on her résumé — plays a scheming young woman with payback on her mind as she moves among Long Island’s wealthy elite. The creators of this show say they were inspired by “The Count of Monte Cristo,” though I suspect more viewers will remember the Hamptons episodes of “The Real Housewives of NYC.” Anyway, it’s well done — but enough with the rich beautiful people, already. Verdict: Needs work.•“Up All Night” (NBC, premieres 9 p.m. Wednesday; time slot will move to 7 p.m.). Maya Rudolph plays a talk-show host — a stretch, right? — whose producer (Christina Applegate) and her hubby (Will Arnett) decide to have a baby after years of procrastinating. The show is retooling to feature Rudolph more, which is good, but Applegate is still attached, which means Arnett is once again paired with someone much less funny than himself (as on “Running Wilde” last year). Verdict: Needs work.•“I Hate My Teenage Daughter” (Fox, 8:30 p.m. Nov. 23). Well, I’m not that wild about your show. A show about two single moms and their disappointing offspring wants to be catty and winds up just being mean. The hard edge perhaps owes to the decision to make it a traditional, multi-camera sitcom (as opposed to the point-of-view camera used in “Raising Hope”). Verdict: Skip it. •“H8R” (The CW, 7 p.m. Wednesday). Mario Lopez hosts this reality show that arranges for reality stars to ambush ordinary people who say unkind things about them on Facebook and Twitter. Yep, it’s Bill O’Reilly’s Jesse-cam for the under-50 crowd. In the demo reel provided to critics, “Jersey Shore’s” Snooki confronts someone for daring to suggest she doesn’t deserve $30,000 an episode. What I want to know is how much Lopez is making to produce the worst new show of the fall. Oh yeah, I said it. Come and get me, Slater! Verdict: Skip it.
WEDNESDAY
7 p.m.•The Middle, ABC•Survivor: South Pacific, CBS★The X Factor, Fox★Up All Night, NBC★H8R, The CW7:30 p.m.★Suburgatory, ABC★Free Agents, NBC8 p.m.•Modern Family, ABC•Criminal Minds, CBS•Harry’s Law, NBC•America’s Next Top Model, The CW8:30 p.m.•Happy Endings, ABC★I Hate My Teenage Daughter, Fox9 p.m.★Revenge, ABC•CSI, CBS•Law & Order: SVU, NBC★American Horror Story, FX★ = New series
7 p.m.•The Middle, ABC•Survivor: South Pacific, CBS★The X Factor, Fox★Up All Night, NBC★H8R, The CW7:30 p.m.★Suburgatory, ABC★Free Agents, NBC8 p.m.•Modern Family, ABC•Criminal Minds, CBS•Harry’s Law, NBC•America’s Next Top Model, The CW8:30 p.m.•Happy Endings, ABC★I Hate My Teenage Daughter, Fox9 p.m.★Revenge, ABC•CSI, CBS•Law & Order: SVU, NBC★American Horror Story, FX★ = New series
$25 for 2 tickets and $20 in Food & Drink; a $50 Value! KC Improv Comedy Club
